Thoughts I have at night after watching a horror movie

1. Okay, honestly, that movie was so cheesy and fake. It wasn’t even scary at all.

2. See? I’m just going to turn off the light and walk to my bed.

3. Nothing is going to happen. Nothing is going grab me from under the bed.

4. Oh shit. It’s really dark.

5. Oh my god, can the monsters sense my fear?

6. RUN!

7. Whew, made it to my bed. I’m safe. I will not die today.

8. Wait – by saying that did I accidently jinx myself?

9. No. Take a deep breath and you’ll be fine.

10. Was that just a sound I heard?

Continue reading Thoughts I have at night after watching a horror movie

People I Hate

  1. Slow walkers
    What’s worse is when they walk in packs so there’s no way to get in front of them
  2. Little kids who have iPads
    I’m 14 and I don’t even have a phone yet… -_-
  3. Little kids who ask “why” constantly
    I wonder why too, kid. I wonder why too.
  4. Stinky people
    Please, have you heard of fucking deodorant before
  5. The clingy “friend”
    For some reason, this person never seems to get a hint. I mean, am I really a monster for wanting to hang out with my actual friends?
  6. People who fish for compliments
    Nope, putting yourself down all the time will not make people compliment you. I know, right? What a surprise! I never knew!
  7. People who are perfect at EVERYTHING… but they’re also nice making it impossible for them to hate Continue reading People I Hate

Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson were going camping…

Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson were going camping. They pitched their tent under the stars and went to sleep. Sometime in the middle of the night, Holmes woke Watson up and said: “Watson, look up at the sky and tell me what you see.”

Watson replied: “I see millions and millions of stars.”

Holmes said: “And what do you deduce from that?”

Watson replied: “Well, if there are millions of stars, and if even a few of those have planets, it’s quite likely there are some planets like Earth out there. And if there are a few planets like Earth out there, there might also be life.”

And Holmes said: “Watson, you idiot, it means somebody stole our tent.”

-Kitty