I no longer care if you know where I live


Like the title says, I no longer care if you know where I live. Unless of course, you’re a murderer/rapist/burglar. Then here are 10 reasons why I am not worth your time:

  1. I’m actually quite scary. I have a black belt in karate. I can throw knives. Don’t mess with me.
  2. My neighbours are scary.Β They have big and loud dogs that have no qualms about biting your ass. It’s painful. Don’t mess with them.
  3. My sister is scary. She can scream real loud. We use her if we don’t have time to call 911. It is still very effective. Don’t mess with her.
  4. My mom is scary. She can tell when you’re lying. So don’t pretend to be innocent. It won’t work. Don’t mess with her.
  5. My dad is scary. He has mastered the art of glares and annoyed grumbles. Also, he’s strong and can wield chopsticks like a pro. Don’t mess with him.
  6. My friends are scary. They will attack youwith weird and random noises. It will ruin your ears. You will die because it’s just so weird. Don’t mess with them.
  7. My stuffed animals are scary. Just like in Toy Story, they can come to life. Except they’re not friendly. They’re like Lotso. They will murder you in a heartbeat, just like those Urban legends that you probably shouldn’t read when you’re alone and it’s nighttime. What an embarrassing death, too. Don’t mess with them.
  8. My teachers are scary. Once they give youΒ the look, you are done for. They will fail you without mercy. Don’t mess with them.
  9. My favourite book characters are scary. Percy Jackson will chop you in half with that sword of his. Alina Starkov will blind you with her powers and THEN kill you. Even Voldemort takes orders from me. AND THEY WILL ALL COME TO KILL YOU SO BEWARE! Don’t mess with them.
  10. My future is scary. Oh so scary. You will die even THINKING of it. So, like everything about me, don’t mess with it.

So here are 10 reasons why you should never mess with me. Although, now that I think of it, it would be pretty fun to mutilate you and use your tortured screams as my relaxing playlist. Yes, it would be fun. Oh very, very fun… 😈

Have a lovely day, my friends πŸ™‚

-Kitty

Advertisements

Published by

Kitty

professional cat

27 thoughts on “I no longer care if you know where I live”

  1. WHAT BLACK BELT DANNGG
    my dog is scary. he will threaten you by pulling you with the leash (and all the while choking himself) whenever he sees a bike (even if its fking PARKED)
    WEIRD NOISES–WATCH OUT LADIES AND GENTS HERE COMES MOMMA

    Like

    1. lol your dog and his wedgies xD
      yes weird noises are amazing
      they will protect you from the evil people of the world

      (shhhh i actually never did karate before but you dont need to know that)

      Liked by 1 person

      1. i’ve seen dog diapers at petsmart tho
        probs owners just frustrated and done with life xD
        actually i’ve heard from somewhere that female dogs (huehuehue) can get periods too…
        WELP

        Like

  2. actually same lol i can throw knives too #sobadass
    even if i’m really clumsy i can literally walk out of the house without being seen and call 911

    Like

      1. huh? no it’s okay
        it’s just that it’s really easy to tell exactly where I live from one of my last posts (if you know what to google then you can probably tell…)
        i used to be pretty scared to post things like that but now i hardly care so yay! πŸ˜€

        Like

      1. I only see mooses in national parks, although we do have some moose crossings on the road. Doesn’t matter how hard I try, I can never seem to find one. (Not that I looked for one though…)

        Liked by 1 person

Leave a Comment

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s